Thursday, July 10, 2003
Yeah.
Three weeks ago, we auditioned this kid, Brad, for our show Stupid Kids. The script calls for the other character to give my character a “titty twister”. Purple nurple, tune in tokyo, whatever you wish. Well, the kid who was auditioning grabbed my tit and twisted it so hard that for the last 3 weeks I have had a yellowish bruise around my nip. Fine. I can deal with that. It’s ugly, but I can deal with that. BUT THEN! This morning I wake up to find that my entire left nipple is swollen and there seems to be a rock hard substance beneath the skin. It is incredibly painful. I have run my fingers over the nipple about a thousand and one times and I can’t figure out what the solid deposit could be made of. Ari has inspected the nipple and she seems to think that it’s just a bad bruise. But do bruises get pregnant with hard deposits? I don’t know.
Either way I could kill that fucker right about now. Good thing we didn’t cast his violent ass in the show. Otherwise I would be severely scared of the scene that calls for him to knife me in the gut.
Sike, there is no such scene. But still, I’d be scared of him twisting and hurting my innocent niggles.
Yes I wrote niggles. Love it.
Anyhoodles, tonight is our first cast meeting! AY YI YI! We are all meeting at a bar at 7pm to get to know one another. I am kind of nervous, kind of excited, but also dreading it. I don’t want to spend any money on this event, but even moreso I don’t want to get to know these people WITHOUT alcohol, so I guess the best decision was made. Can I just NOT be so poor? I couldn’t even buy myself a new pair of kicks. Luckily Ari came to the rescue on that one and got me a pair for my birthday. Do you think they sell nipples for a reasonable price at Walmart? I could surely use a new one.
To me, Nick Lachey is really really hot. He has a new reality show coming out called Newlyweds and supposedly it chronicles his and Jessica Simpson’s first year being married. Okay, I HATE Jessica Simpson, but mostly because she gets to have Nick Lachey in her vaginer. The show itself will probably be LAME CITY USA, but as long as he takes his shirt off every time he’s in front of the camera, I don’t care. I’d watch him take a shit if he had his shirt off. (HORK!) It’s just that he is so damn phyne. And I am so damn swollen from that jerkoff dickhead that twisted my niggle.
Do you think if someone looks up “niggle” on Google, they will come across my site and think that I’m a facist. Er, I mean racist? Cuz honestly, fuck you. Don’t judge me.
Today I bought a three-pack bar of soap. Big news, right? Well kinda. Cuz I bought Coast bar soap for the first time in my life. Supposedly it wakes you up with it’s “refreshing deodorant smell”. I only bought it cause the commercials seem so convincing. I figure, why not try out a little test of my own. Okay, I guess not such big news, huh? Oh I’M sorry. Are you BORED? Yeah, well fine. I didn’t know that this journal was called “For your interest only”!
Shit.
I’m spicey today, right? I don’t know why. I don’t feel spicey. In all actuality, I feel ricey. You know, cuz of my Asian hair.
Okay, should I have called this post “Doing my best to offend all ethnicity’s”? Cuz really. I need to stop. I’m 26 now and we don’t make jokes like that when we are 26.
At 26, we make jokes like this:
“What do you call a fly with no wings?”
Well, “A WALK” of course! HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR.
Okay, wanna hear the most ridiculous part about that joke? I am so braindead to jokes that I had to look up “Lame Jokes” on the internet and that’s what I came up with.
I did find one kinda funny one. Wanna hear it?
Fuck yourself then.
Here it is:
What do you call a person with leprosy in a bathtub?
Stew
oh THAT’S rich.
Righty Oh. I am off for today.
Enjoy your Thursday evening. Whatever you decide to do with it.
You stupid niggle.
Three weeks ago, we auditioned this kid, Brad, for our show Stupid Kids. The script calls for the other character to give my character a “titty twister”. Purple nurple, tune in tokyo, whatever you wish. Well, the kid who was auditioning grabbed my tit and twisted it so hard that for the last 3 weeks I have had a yellowish bruise around my nip. Fine. I can deal with that. It’s ugly, but I can deal with that. BUT THEN! This morning I wake up to find that my entire left nipple is swollen and there seems to be a rock hard substance beneath the skin. It is incredibly painful. I have run my fingers over the nipple about a thousand and one times and I can’t figure out what the solid deposit could be made of. Ari has inspected the nipple and she seems to think that it’s just a bad bruise. But do bruises get pregnant with hard deposits? I don’t know.
Either way I could kill that fucker right about now. Good thing we didn’t cast his violent ass in the show. Otherwise I would be severely scared of the scene that calls for him to knife me in the gut.
Sike, there is no such scene. But still, I’d be scared of him twisting and hurting my innocent niggles.
Yes I wrote niggles. Love it.
Anyhoodles, tonight is our first cast meeting! AY YI YI! We are all meeting at a bar at 7pm to get to know one another. I am kind of nervous, kind of excited, but also dreading it. I don’t want to spend any money on this event, but even moreso I don’t want to get to know these people WITHOUT alcohol, so I guess the best decision was made. Can I just NOT be so poor? I couldn’t even buy myself a new pair of kicks. Luckily Ari came to the rescue on that one and got me a pair for my birthday. Do you think they sell nipples for a reasonable price at Walmart? I could surely use a new one.
To me, Nick Lachey is really really hot. He has a new reality show coming out called Newlyweds and supposedly it chronicles his and Jessica Simpson’s first year being married. Okay, I HATE Jessica Simpson, but mostly because she gets to have Nick Lachey in her vaginer. The show itself will probably be LAME CITY USA, but as long as he takes his shirt off every time he’s in front of the camera, I don’t care. I’d watch him take a shit if he had his shirt off. (HORK!) It’s just that he is so damn phyne. And I am so damn swollen from that jerkoff dickhead that twisted my niggle.
Do you think if someone looks up “niggle” on Google, they will come across my site and think that I’m a facist. Er, I mean racist? Cuz honestly, fuck you. Don’t judge me.
Today I bought a three-pack bar of soap. Big news, right? Well kinda. Cuz I bought Coast bar soap for the first time in my life. Supposedly it wakes you up with it’s “refreshing deodorant smell”. I only bought it cause the commercials seem so convincing. I figure, why not try out a little test of my own. Okay, I guess not such big news, huh? Oh I’M sorry. Are you BORED? Yeah, well fine. I didn’t know that this journal was called “For your interest only”!
Shit.
I’m spicey today, right? I don’t know why. I don’t feel spicey. In all actuality, I feel ricey. You know, cuz of my Asian hair.
Okay, should I have called this post “Doing my best to offend all ethnicity’s”? Cuz really. I need to stop. I’m 26 now and we don’t make jokes like that when we are 26.
At 26, we make jokes like this:
“What do you call a fly with no wings?”
Well, “A WALK” of course! HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR.
Okay, wanna hear the most ridiculous part about that joke? I am so braindead to jokes that I had to look up “Lame Jokes” on the internet and that’s what I came up with.
I did find one kinda funny one. Wanna hear it?
Fuck yourself then.
Here it is:
What do you call a person with leprosy in a bathtub?
Stew
oh THAT’S rich.
Righty Oh. I am off for today.
Enjoy your Thursday evening. Whatever you decide to do with it.
You stupid niggle.
